Bear Witness as I Experience My First Time...

It seems we’re born into a world where everyone is blind.

We don’t know who we are; so we search, arms outstretched, wandering, hoping we run into some form of ourselves that might know the answers.

It’s during that journey through the darkness that many people turn to religion.

Religion provides millions of people with the answers they seek, but for countless others it only raises more questions that outweigh the faith required to believe.

My journey is about to take a turn that every fiber of my being tells me not to follow. And I’m going to need your help.

First, though, a little history.

I spent the first 28 years of my life staunchly opposed to the idea of God and dismissed Christianity, along with all other religions, as mythical stories believed only by the weak-minded.

Then, about six years ago, some things began to happen that jolted my perception of the spiritual realm; things that seem unreal when I look back at them today.  Eventually those experiences opened some new paths in my life, one of which led to the Relief Journal.

It’s been about two years since my first blog at Relief and I’ve contributed sporadically since then. Just recently I had the opportunity to take the blog manager position here, which I humbly accepted.

Many people, including myself, find this more than ironic considering my anti-Christian past. I still don’t label myself a Christian, but I am highly spiritual and have developed a deep respect for all religions, including Christianity.

After accepting the position here, a friend posed a resounding and poignant question. She said, “You don’t comment on movies you haven’t seen, right? How can you comment on a religion when you haven’t read its book?”

Well… shit. I didn’t have an answer. At least not a good one.

While I love being right, I’m certainly not opposed to admitting when I’ve been called out. That was a moment I had my legs swept from beneath me and I could only raise the white flag of defeat while acknowledging she had one hell of a good point.

So I decided I should read the Bible.

You have to understand that if I had the choice between getting caught by someone while secretly reading the Bible or watching porn involving transvestite grandmas with Spanish men, I’d choose the porn every time. There’s not as much shame involved.

I’ve thrown at least two Bibles in the garbage and even seriously considered burning the insanely expensive one we got for our wedding just to see those pathetically thin pages go up in flames.

And so I’ve gone from that closed-minded attitude of years past to openly committing to read the Bible, in its entirety. Even writing those words causes my blood pressure to rise, though I’m not sure if it’s out of embarrassment, because I’m fundamentally opposed to the book or just afraid of what I might find in it.

I’ll start on May 2 and, as my editors here requested, try to finish on July 30. That’s only 90 days, and I’ll try, but make no promises! I do promise to document my progress and express my thoughts and reactions to the book in this space. I expect some of it will piss me off, some will make me laugh, some will cause me to shake my head in disbelief and some, hopefully, will resonate with messages of pure, unconditional love.

At least a couple of Relief staffers have committed to read during the same time, and I hope you will too. I could use the help with my questions, have you take part in the comments and hopefully get inspiration from your reactions as you witness a guy experiencing the Bible for the first time.

Any tips for a Bible virgin?

***

Travis Griffith, Relief's Blog Manager, is a former atheist now exploring what a spiritual life really means. His children’s book, Your Father Forever, was published in 2005 by Illumination Arts Publishing Company, Inc. Travis works from his home in Spokane, WA as a professional writer.

He Is Risen: Easter Poem

Click over to The Englewood Review of Books to read a poem on Easter by the 19th century British poet Gerard Manley Hopkins. Hopkins was virtually unknown as a poet in his lifetime but was rediscovered by the modernists as an innovator in verse form.

The Faith of Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Usually I write to encourage people to give to Relief but today I would like to pay tribute to a great person who fought for Truth. I came across this blog by Eric Metaxas and I wanted to share an excerpt from it. Dietrich Bonhoeffer was a brilliant young pastor and a theologian, whose deep faith in God led him to get involved in the plot to kill Hitler. When Hitler learned of Bonhoeffer's involvement he flew into a typically violent rage. As one of his final acts of revenge -- just three weeks before he committed suicide -- Hitler condemned the young pastor to death. Bonhoeffer was hanged on April 9, 1945 at Flossenburg Concentration camp.  But by all accounts, Bonhoeffer went to his death with the peace of God, with no regrets. How can that be? He was 39 years old, widely reckoned a theological genius. He had already written two of the classic books of the 20th century, "The Cost of Discipleship" and "Life Together." He was engaged to be married to a wonderful young woman. He had such a terrifically bright future! Bonhoeffer even had an opportunity to escape his fate. In my book I tell the story of how he had fled to America, but then decided to return to Germany, to face the horrors that lay ahead with his people. Why did he return when he didn't have to? And why didn't he have any regrets for doing so, even after he knew he would pay the ultimate price? Just before he died, Bonhoeffer told a fellow prisoner, "This is the end. But for me, the beginning of life." But on that day -- April 20, 1945 (Hitlar’s last birthday mentioned earlier in the original post)-- who was happy and who was at peace, Hitler or Bonhoeffer? For that matter, which of them is happy and at peace today? It's something chilling to think about, the contrast between these two Germans, between these two lives and these two deaths. But at this time of year especially, it's appropriate that perhaps we do think about it. But at this time of year, when Passover and Easter are being celebrated it's especially appropriate that we do think about it. Do those of us who say we believe in God really believe it? Because if we do, it will affect how we behave today, this week, this month... If we believe in the word of God, as Bonhoeffer did, it will give us the courage do the right thing wherever we are. Like Bonhoeffer, we will do the right thing and trust God with the consequences. Faith and courage go together. Bonhoeffer's faith gave him the courage to stand against the greatest evil of the 20th century. And today we celebrate him and revile the inhuman tyrant he stood against. So this Easter season, dare to think about what you really believe. What you believe about your faith will affect how you behave today and how people regard you years from today. That's a fact. Let the life of Bonhoeffer, lived in faith and without fear, be a source of encouragement to you, so that your life in turn may be a source of encouragement to others in years to come.

I agree with Metaxas call to think about what you believe.  Do you really believe in the truth and power of scripture? What would your life look like if you did? What do your actions show that you believe in – yourself or the Truth of God? I think that Easter is a time that we should reflect on our faith since it is the time when the curtain separating the Holy of Holies was torn in two giving us the opportunity to approach the throne of God with confidence and covered by his grace.

Bonnie Ponce is the Director of Support Raising for Relief and lives in Huntsville, Texas with her husband and betta fish. She has a BA in English from Sam Houston State University. After work she enjoys relaxing with a good book or working on her novel.

Inspired to Give

Bonnie Ponce challenges those who have not contributed to the Love Relief campaign to read these stories and give to Relief.

As I was browsing through the internet, I came across this website of a company who helps charities raise support with capital campaigns.  I thought I would share this story to inspire you about why we ask you to give.  In the stories, the donors give $15,000 and $35,000 but we are only asking that you consider a gift of $25 or $50 or whatever you are inspired and able to give.  This story is from cdsfunds.com

“If you ever needed affirmation about why we do this for a living, these two tales carry a strong message.”

By: Greg Bowden

Fundraising can become such a mechanical process, in which we focus on rating prospects, writing proposals and scheduling logistics. This is never truer than in the midst of a capital campaign, when the pace of activity must be very high and everyone is focused on the bottom line of the campaign’s financial goal. In these instances, we can lose sight of the fact that we are meeting with real people and challenging them to think about their charitable priorities. Often, those donors take our requests very seriously and make decisions that broaden their philanthropy and demonstrate the impact of successful fundraising.

I am currently conducting a campaign for a YMCA resident and day camp based in the Berkshire Mountains of Massachusetts, which serves predominantly Connecticut, Massachusetts and metropolitan New York. We recently had two solicitations that produced surprising and very touching results. It was a reminder to me that our work allows us to have an impact on the lives of our donors as well as our organizations.

A few months ago we met with a couple who are very involved, charitable residents in the local community. While they had not given to the camp in the past, they were friends of the camp’s director. They agreed to meet with us, and were frankly shocked when we asked them for a pledge of $25,000 over five years. The wife commented that was more than they contribute to their church. The husband suggested they might be able to do something in the neighborhood of $15,000 and they would give it some thought.

When we followed up with them, the husband confirmed that they would pledge $15,000 to the campaign. He went on to say that our request had really stretched them, which had forced them to examine what they could truly do, rather than easily saying yes to a modest request. Their deliberations had further prompted them to take a look at all of their charitable priorities. How much did they contribute overall? If they seriously wanted to make this gift, but had trouble budgeting it, what did that say about their philanthropy? What changes were they able to make in their life that would allow them to meet their charitable goals?

All of these deliberations resulted in a lifestyle change for the couple. When the husband informed us of their decision, he explained that they had decided to sell their new BMW and buy a used Volkswagen, freeing up additional funds to make this pledge possible. As we were running a campaign for a children’s camp, I immediately thought of that saying, “A hundred years from now, it will not matter what kind of car you drove, or what sort of house you lived in, or how big your bank account was. But the world may be better because you were important in the life of a child.”

The second story came from an alumnus of the camp, who now lives in a town in coastal Connecticut. Both his parents were now deceased and, without siblings, it fell to him to sell their home and resolve their estate. He decided that he would put some of the proceeds from the house sale toward certain charitable projects. Despite the fact that he had no idea they were conducting a capital campaign, his first thoughts were of the Camp that had provided him such a significant experience in his childhood. He called the Camp’s executive director—actually calling twice before he got the director on the phone—and told the director that he wanted to make a significant charitable gift.

The donor’s objective was to make a gift to the endowment, the income from which would fund scholarships for less fortunate children to attend Camp. He was considering giving $15,000. The Camp’s executive director pointed out that, in order to maintain the principal in perpetuity that would not generate much income each year. With some polite probing, the Camp’s director was able to learn that the donor’s true intent was to fund four scholarships each year. That would require a gift of about $35,000. Once the Camp’s director was able to communicate what would be necessary to achieve the donor’s goal, the alumnus readily agreed to make the gift.

We do so much work changing the lives of those people who receive our services, it is easy to forget that we are often changing the lives of our donors as well. Helping people raise their sights in these ways is a critical step in their philanthropic lifespan. It will have a leveraged impact far beyond the value of their current gift, as they will apply their new philosophy to all future charitable decisions, as well.

Bonnie Ponce is the Director of Support Raising for Relief and lives in Huntsville, Texas with her husband and betta fish. She has a BA in English from Sam Houston State University. After work she enjoys relaxing with a good book or working on her novel.

When Books are Burned

In 1933, in one of the first steps leading to the Holocaust, the Nazi regime ordered that any and all books deemed “subversive” to Hitler’s rule must be burned.  There were book-burnings in the streets, carried out by university students and Nazi supporters, who collected all censored literary works and threw them into the flames.

Surprisingly, among the books sentenced to burning were works by what we now view as classics, works by Helen Keller, Albert Einstein, Jack London, Upton Sinclair, and H.G. Wells.  Philosophical and political works were designated for destruction, but also children’s literature, theatrical works, and stories.

It is something of a wonder that one of the most powerful political movements of its day would feel so threatened by a story.

Perhaps the books were burned because even Nazis knew the insurmountable power of words.  Perhaps they were burned because language is so strong, so potentially dangerous, that the Germans only knew one way to address it: to treat it as an enemy.  Hitler himself attested to the importance of words as he used prophetic voice, persuasive rhetoric, and euphemism as some of his primary weapons for his Nazi cause.

While Hitler exploited language for evil during the Holocaust, other words were uttered, at great personal risk, for the sake of truth.  Dietrich Bonheoffer was one such voice; a Lutheran pastor who actively opposed Hitler, Bonheoffer urged his congregations not to conform to Nazi ideas up until his execution shortly before the end of the war.  Irene Harand, an Austrian human rights activist, wrote a public response to Hitler’s Mein Kampf, or “My Struggle”, which she titled, “His Struggle: An Answer to Hitler”.  Martin Niemoller organized the Confessional Church, a Christian group that resisted the Nazi movement, and avowed in the last sermon before his arrest, “No more are we ready to keep silent at man’s behest when God commands us to speak…”

These voices and many more spoke out against the deafening tide of propaganda, and they were heard.  Helen Keller, whose own books were publicly burned including The Story of My Life, responded to the censorship by saying, “History has taught you nothing if you think you can kill ideas. Tyrants have tried to do that often before, and the ideas have risen up in their might and destroyed them.”

What are your views on censorship? How far do you think the power of words can reach in its influence for good or evil?

Touching Scars

Taking a break from my thoughts on place, I wanted to write about doubt. Or English muffins.

Or, really, about Thomas.

As one prone to pressing fingers into my own scars, I've always felt a bit connected to the Missouri of disciples. I think it was because he was supposed to be the one we all looked down on (other  than Judas, but I think that goes without saying even as I finish saying it).

But Thomas, he was the one who didn't believe. He had to be shown. Personally, I think he was just the one who put words to what the other disciples who hadn't been there to see the vacant tomb were thinking.

Recently, I started thinking about Thomas as an author (not about him working as an author, but as an author thinking about Thomas as a symbol…got that?)

I think my initial misconceptions about the most famous doubter in the Bible (though not the biggest or most egregious) have led me to seeing him in a new way. He’s what all artists who claim a faith should aspire to.

Thomas wasn't satisfied with intellectual knowledge that Christ was risen. He wanted to press his fingertips into physical evidence of the miracle that still makes people choose love over what their own eyes tell them. He wanted to feel life in the hands he’d seen lifeless. He wanted to get messy to know, definitively, that we can now be clean.

And that’s what our art should be – a reckless engagement with the scars of living so that they can begin to heal.

Earth Day, Good Friday, and Wholeness

This month, we are approaching two national holidays. They happen to fall on the same day. But depending on your political, religious, liberal, conservative, radical, conventional standing, you may lean more towards one than the other, or even feel like you have to choose between the two.

Earth Day was instituted in 1970 by Senator Gaylord Nelson, it was a political initiative, intended to enforce national environmental responsibility, and this new holiday birthed the modern environmental movement. Good Friday is annually observed by Christians to remember Christ’s crucifixion and death so many years ago. To the church, Good Friday, together with Holy Saturday and Easter Sunday, is the culmination of history, fulfilling Scripture’s promises that a Savior would come into the world and redeem it.

This year April 22^nd hosts both Earth Day and Good Friday, and to many people, these holidays may seem to be at odds with each other.  In my experience, Christians are more interested in discipleship than reducing their carbon footprint. Female ministers and abortion can be hot topics, but global warming? Not so much.  Likewise, the people who champion green living march under the banner of sustainability, health, and animal rights. Talk of soul-saving doesn’t really hold appeal, because in their mind, they’re already saving the planet.

It saddens me that anyone would think these two ideals have to be pitted against each other as if in a bull pen. Because in my perspective, both holidays have to do with wholeness. Whole earth, whole redemption, whole life.

Eden was once whole, a perfect earth, perfect creation, and perfect humanity. God called it, “very good.” But sin crept into this good garden and fragmented it, introducing thorns and dry soil, pain and pride—toxic to both our bodies and our souls.

Good Friday marks a turn in our decaying world.   A man who was God sacrificed His life for the world, and this set into action a redemption that would work both backwards and forwards, pulling this broken earth and its broken people into a new heaven and new earth. One day, the effects of sin will be reversed, and the new heaven and earth will reign in renewed wholeness. Christ’s sacrifice on Good Friday set all of this into motion.

Scripture says that creation is in bondage just as are the children of God. “For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the first fruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies” (Romans 8:22-23).

This April 22^nd, let’s groan and wait together, the earth and God’s children, the created crying out to our Creator.

Stephanie S. Smith graduated from Moody Bible Institute with a degree in Communications and Women’s Ministry, which she now puts to work freelancing as a book publicist and writer through her business, (In)dialogue Communications, at www.stephaniessmith.com. After living in Chicago for four years, traveling to Amsterdam for a spell, and then moving back home to Baltimore to plan a wedding, she now lives with her husband in Upstate New York where they make novice attempts at home renovation in their 1930s bungalow. She writes for www.startmarriageright.com and manages Moody Publishers’ blog, www.insidepages.net.

An Offering of the Heart

Bonnie Ponce reflects on the book of Nehemiah and how the people sacrificed to rebuild the wall of Jerusalem and how that relates to supporting Relief. Recently our church began to study the book of Nehemiah. Nehemiah is a book about a man, Nehemiah, who sees a need to lead his people to rebuilding the Jerusalem’s wall, which has been destroyed. He brings hope to his people and inspires them to work hard. In chapter 3 of Nehemiah, there is a list of all the people that work on the wall – the important people, servants, nobles, people that work on the wall without the support of others. People from different back grounds work together. Even how much work they do is noted.

“Nehemiah…made repairs as far as a point opposite the tombs of David, and as far as the artificial pool and the house of the mighty men.” Neh. 3:16

“Benjamin and Hasshub carried out repairs in front of their house. After them Azariah the son of Maaseiah, son of Ananiah, carried out repairs beside his house.” Neh. 3:23

Relief inspires people to write, to read, to think, and to build up the Christian community with engaging literature. Relief units people of all beliefs to see Christian literature in a new light – what it can be when it is well written and deals with tough issues. Giving should be an offering of the heart. At Relief, we ask you for your financial support because we have a financial need.

Some people are able to give a lot and some people are only able to give a small gift but the important thing is that everyone sacrificed their time and efforts and did what they were able to do to build the wall in Jerusalem. At Relief we ask that if you support our efforts to bring amazing literature to print then please consider a gift – give what you are able to sacrifice. Our campaign will end on April 15, so listen to your heart and give to Relief!

Each of you should give whatever you have decided. You shouldn't be sorry that you gave or feel forced to give, since God loves a cheerful giver. 2 Corinthians 9:7 (God’s Word translation)

Bonnie Ponce is the Director of Support Raising for Relief and lives in Huntsville, Texas with her husband and betta fish. She has a BA in English from Sam Houston State University. After work she enjoys relaxing with a good book or working on her novel.

Are We Due for a Split in Christianity?

Ian David Philpot, ccPublishing's Web Editor, has been reading about a possible division in the Christian faith and shares his thoughts. Jimmy Spencer, a friend of mine and of Relief, wrote a note on Facebook recently that got picked up on a blog. It was titled The Coming Evangelical Split? Feel free to click on the title to read it, but for those of you who prefer a summation, here you go: Jimmy believes that Rob Bell's new book, Love Wins, is either starting or bringing to light a split between hardcore conservative evangelicals and progressive evangelicals. Jimmy doesn't know if it's good or bad, but he know's it's coming, and it is, in large, thanks to the Rob Bell controversy.

When I read that, I didn't want to believe it at first. Religion feels so global to me. And do people in other countries really care about what some guy in Grand Rapids, MI, is saying about whether Ghandi is in heaven or hell? Would that really cause all of us to pick a side and split?

But Jimmy's a smart guy. If he's sure it's coming, then why I am trying to think he's not right.

Later, I saw Evangelicalism Won't Split, It's Erroding--a response to Jimmy. (I'd sum up, but you can get the basics from the title.) Then I read about a pastor in North Carolina who lost his job after writing something on Facebook in support of Love Wins. No joke.

Historically, the Christian church goes through something big about every 500 years. In Phyllis Tickle's The Great Emergence, she points out events of the past that show a pattern. Going back from present day, there's the Protestant Reformation in 1517 (thanks to Martin Luther, some paper, and a nail), the Great Schism in 1054 (when the Greek Orthodox Church and Roman Catholic Church excommunicated each other), the fall of the Roman Empire in the late sixth century which greatly affected the Roman Catholic Church (aka (basically) the only church back then), and the apostles work in the first century. So there's a decent pattern there. And Tickle believes that we're on the edge of the Great Emergence--a change in the church that will link religion and culture in a way that changes Christianity. (I don't know if I believe it, but she does.)

So, my guess is that Jimmy is predicting that we are nearing, what I will call, the Great Contest--where either love wins or conservative evangelicalism wins, depending on which side you're on.

I, personally, think Jimmy's right. I think we're close to something. I just don't know if it'll be something we notice, or if it will be something that takes a decade to settle before we realize that we're not as close in doctrine with as many denominations as we thought.

Do you think we're nearing a split in Christianity and/or Evangelicalism? Can Christianity stand to take another split or is it too close to obliteration (or marginalization) as it is?

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Jimmy Spencer started Love Without Agenda, a nonprofit organization with a simple yet compelling message: to encourage people to change the world--and themselves--one act of love at a time. Check out lovewithoutagenda.com where you can download a free copy of Jimmy's new book, Love Without Agenda: My Journey Out of Consumer Christianity.

Those in Hell Can Come to Heaven

Bonnie ponders C. S. Lewis' question of what would happen if people sent to hell could visit heaven. C.S. Lewis’ controversial novella, The Great Divorce, offers a unique view of heaven and hell. In the opening of the story the narrator is standing in line for a bus in Gray Town. It is a dreary place that is perpetually twilight and raining. When the bus comes, it takes them to heaven, a bright and colorful place, totally opposite of Gray Town. The premise is that anyone who wants to stay in heaven can, but they have to speak to a person from their past that they knew on earth.

Three interactions between visitors from Gray Town and residents from heaven are examples Lewis’ social commentary of our culture.

The Apostate and the Spirit After they great each other, they begin to discuss their friendship on earth and their current locations. The Apostate asks, “Do you really think that people are penalized for their honest opinions? Even assuming, for the sake of argument, that those opinions were mistaken.” The Spirit asserts that they followed the academic fads of the times, stating that, “we were afraid of crude salvationism, afraid of a breach with the spirit of the age, afraid of ridicule, afraid (above all) of real spiritual fears and hopes… Having allowed oneself to drift, unresisting, un-praying, accepting every half-conscious solicitation from our desires we reached a point where we no longer believed in the Faith…The beliefs are sincere in the sense that they do occur as psychological events in the man’s mind. If that’s what you mean by sincerity they are sincere, and so were ours. But errors which are sincere in that sense are not innocent.” They continue to talk and the Spirit asks his friend to repent and believe in God, the eternal fact. The Apostate returns to Gray Town unable to repent.

The Man in Sexual Sin There is a man, like a ghost but dark and oily stumbling through Heaven. He carries on his shoulder a red lizard that whispers in his ear. An Angel approaches him and asks him if he would like him to quiet the lizard and the ghost replies that he would. The Angel states that to silence the lizard, he will have to kill him. The lizard’s voice becomes louder as the Angel continues to offer to kill it. He says, “I know there are no real pleasure now, only dreams. But aren’t they better than nothing? And I’ll be so good. I admit I’ve sometimes gone too far in the past but I promise I won’t do it again. I’ll give you nothing but really nice dreams-all sweet and fresh and almost innocent. You might say, quite innocent…” The man agrees to let the Angel kill the lizard and out of it comes a beautiful man restored to his sexuality embodied in the form of a great stallion. He stays in heaven to live as a resident of heaven.

Sarah Smith and the Tragedian A woman from Heaven, whose name was Sarah Smith, comes to meet her husband, whose self pity has split his soul in two. The man is now a dwarf, leading a tragedian, which is the embodiment of his self-pity. Even as his wife meets him, his is upset that she didn’t miss him since their death and separation. His wife asks for his forgiveness for all that happened when they were on earth and asks him to let go of the chain connecting him to his self-pity. Unable to let go, eventually his soul disappears and ceases to exist at all.

These three encounters lead us to ponder some interesting questions about our culture today. In the first one, the Apostate is in Hell because though he had sincere beliefs and opinions they were wrong and he was sent to Hell. Would a loving God send us to Hell just because our opinions are wrong?

In the second case, a man who struggles with sexual sin – be it homosexuality, adultery, pornography etc. be redeemed and stay in heaven?

In the third case the man’s self-pity consumes his soul so that he ceases to exist. Does self pity keep us from living?

Bonnie Ponce is the Director of Support Raising for Relief and lives in Huntsville, Texas with her husband and betta fish. She has a BA in English from Sam Houston State University. After work she enjoys relaxing with a good book or working on her novel.

Coffee with an Old Friend

Bonnie wonders if Anne of Green Gables has anything to offer readers today. Recently I picked up Anne of Green Gables and I felt as though I went to get coffee with an old friend.  Her story is inspiring and refreshing.  Her constant upbeat attitude and imagination-run-wild made me smile as I remembered my own childhood imaginations and adventures. I feel as though such uplifting stories are harder to find these days.  Surrounded by self-help books and seminars; conferences for people to learn how to become better people and more organized in a weekend.  We are inundated with so much to remind us what we need to become.  Anne Shirley blunders throughout the story, growing up and often learning difficult lessons about love and friendship and romance.  So often we just want to find a quick fix in a self-help book.  How to date, how to be a good friend, finding romance - all these 12 step solutions.  As Montgomery comments, "We pay a price for everything we get or take in this world; and although ambitions are well worth having, they are not to be cheaply won, but exact their dues of work and self-denial, anxiety and discouragement."  So I wonder is Montgomery right in saying that self-denial leads to things worth having in life?  Anne of Green Gables was published in 1908 and the times were different from our hectic schedules and I wonder at the relevance of this coming of age story.  As much as it is positive and uplifting I find myself wondering if I should put away my self-help books and take the hard road of life or keep seeking a better solution.

Bonnie Ponce is the Director of Support Raising for Relief and lives in Huntsville, Texas with her husband and betta fish. She has a BA in English from Sam Houston State University. After work she enjoys relaxing with a good book or working on her novel.

Love Wins: Unless God Decides You're Evil

Travis Griffith discusses the implications of Rob Bell's new book, Love Wins. Will it define a new Christianity or destroy those who believe him?

To an outsider, the Christian religion can look awfully intimidating.

Between the constant threats of judgment and the, forgive me in advance here, fanciful stories that dot the Christian landscape, it's really no surprise to hear that modern Christianity is struggling a bit.

Seriously, why would a non-Christian voluntarily join a religion where he or she risks eternal damnation in hell come Judgement Day?  Oh, right. They'd do it for the reward of a blissful eternal life in heaven sitting next to the great Mr. Christ.

Well what if damnation was removed from the equation, along with the requirement to devote life to Jesus? Or even know his name?

Whoa. That'll get some attention!

And it has, in the form of a new book from megachurch pastor Rob Bell called Love Wins: A Book About Heaven, Hell, and the Fate of Every Person Who Ever Lived (HarperOne).

Followers of the Christian faith have no doubt heard of him. I have to admit the first I heard his name was earlier this week while reading a newspaper article while on an airplane coming home from a particularly sinful weekend in San Diego. The article laid out a couple of Bell's claims:

• God gives humans the choice to either live with him or without him.
• Death doesn't cut off the ability to repent and there is no infinite torment for things humans did in their finite lifetimes.
• Jesus makes salvation possible, even for those who have never even heard his name.

There are plenty of folks in the Christian world writing Bell off as a heretic and false teacher of Jesus, which of course they have every right to believe.

From the perspective of those in a situation like mine, though, Bell's vision is an incredibly refreshing, loving and accepting message that will appeal to legions of lost young people searching for some kind of spirituality.

In the trailer for his book (which you can watch here), Bell discusses a moment when a church-member said "Gandhi is in hell." That is exactly the kind of close-minded statement  that turns people off to Christianity. Gandhi, the "Great Soul" himself, is as likely to be in hell as Martin Luther King, Jr.

As a believer in the Universe and a fierce proponent of the power of love and acceptance of all humans, I believe Bell's message could be an interpretation of Christianity the world can embrace in the future: a world where everyone can go to heaven and hell simply doesn't exist.

What do you think: is Rob Bell about to become irrelevant or will his message resonate with a new generation of Christians?

***

Travis Griffith, Relief's Blog Manager, is a former atheist now exploring what a spiritual life really means. His children’s book, Your Father Forever, was published in 2005 by Illumination Arts Publishing Company, Inc. Travis works from his home in Spokane, WA as a professional writer.

The Inconvenience of Lent

In our American culture of drive-through coffee, instant Twitter feeds, and video on demand, we prize immediacy. We like to check our email on our touchscreen phone as soon as it hits our inbox, grab lunch to-go, and download live-streaming news. We are a nation of busy professionals, parents, and students living under the banner of “carpe diem,” driven by the idea that there’s no time like the present.

This “now” syndrome certainly has advantages, motivating us to work hard and invest fully in whatever we’re doing, but what happens when we apply our instant-culture values to spirituality?

Last month, I had a bizarre experience with communion that made me consider this question. After months of exhausting church-searching, my husband and I finally found a church where we wanted to stay. It’s a contemporary kind of church, the kind that has a graphic designer on staff and a coffee bar out in the hall, and we came because we like the teaching and the small groups. But you have to understand, the church we went to before we moved was a liturgical church, the kind with Kierkegaard quotes in every other sermon and weekly communion. So we knew we’d have to make some adjustments at our new church.

But this is what I did not expect: communion that is served before the service, an addendum tacked onto and separate from the worship service. So we set our alarms a little earlier, entered the sanctuary, and found only a fraction of the congregation had shown up. The pastor said a prayer for this handful of early-risers, and at his invitation we filed up front and received the elements, and then it was over. The whole ordeal took literally five minutes. There was no time of confession before receiving the sacrament. There was no benediction afterwards, charging us to go forth bearing Christ into the world. There was no community, only a faithful few. There was no ritual, no careful unfolding of holiness.

It was like grabbing Christ’s blood of the covenant, His outpouring for the world, in a Styrofoam to-go cup. It was a sacrament dictated by convenience, quickly squeezed in between other items on the agenda, and left out of the greater context of cosmic redemption.

The problem with an instant culture, and an instant church, is that a preoccupation with the present diminishes our ability to see seasons, to see story, to observe the unfolding of time. This is the pivotal idea of the sacrament of communion: Christ asks us to remember Him by taking the bread and wine (Luke 22:19), and to anticipate the future when we will eat and drink with Him face to face (Matt. 26:29).

As we now enter the season of Lent, we enter a time of waiting. There is no immediacy or convenience here. But there is a story of cosmic proportions unfolding, as we take the forty days of Lent to remember, to walk through the events of the life of Christ: the temptation in the desert, the agony of Good Friday, the silence and sorrow of Holy Saturday, and the joyful victory of Sunday morning.

It is often difficult for us to lay down our gadgets and agendas to just sit for a while, quiet our souls, and dwell with God. And yet, He laid down everything for us, making Himself “nothing” and emptying Himself to the point of death (Phil. 2:7-98). In his beautiful poem “Seven Stanzas at Easter,” John Updike writes of the agony of the cross, “Let us not seek to make it less monstrous, for our own convenience...” As we cross the threshold of Ash Wednesday, let us reflect sincerely and sorrowfully on Christ’s suffering for us, so that on Easter morning, our hearts will grasp the incredible joy in His resurrection.

Stephanie S. Smith graduated from Moody Bible Institute with a degree in Communications and Women’s Ministry, which she now puts to work freelancing as a book publicist and writer through her business, (In)dialogue Communications, at www.stephaniessmith.com. After living in Chicago for four years, traveling to Amsterdam for a spell, and then moving back home to Baltimore to plan a wedding, she now lives with her husband in Upstate New York where they make novice attempts at home renovation in their 1930s bungalow. She writes for www.startmarriageright.com and manages Moody Publishers' blog, www.insidepages.net.

Memoirs: Self-Obsessed or Sacramental?

American novelist Henry Adams once wrote, “Everyone must bear his own universe, and most persons are moderately interested in learning how their neighbors have managed to carry theirs.”

This line, written in 1918, would be an understatement for modern readers who are consuming the published memoir as fast as it can be printed. The memoir, as a published form of self-narrative, has successfully climbed the literary ladder, claiming equal standing with the traditional novel and receiving recognition by literary scholars as a genre revolution. Within the past thirty years, the memoir has asserted itself as a rising trend in the writing world.

Yet public responses are mixed: skeptics claim that the memoir indulges in syrupy solipsism, the theory that the self is the only reality, while enthusiasts praise it for the value of self-discovery through story. With an emerging cultural impulse to chronicle the self and such conflicting estimations of this trend, the church must join the conversation. The church must recognize the rise of the self-narrative as a signpost for the human longing for transcendence and affirm storytelling as a sacrament in the high art of illuminating divine grace.

The memoir is a personal narrative that provides the author with a verbal processing of the self’s “becoming.” This kind of literature has charmed millions of readers with this human interest appeal in bestsellers such as The Color of Water by James McBride, The Liar’s Club by Mary Karr, and I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou. The voice of memoir offers its readers an occasion for personal identification so that a reader can find him or herself within the story of another and perhaps borrow the wisdom, healing or insight from similar life threads.

Henry Adams’ idea of the private universe of men is being born into memoir, as the individual universe of motherhood experience, healing from the trauma of abuse, or growing up in a racially mixed family is translated into print. The private universe of the writer, then, opens up a new world to the reader in which a common human spirit is realized, introducing the memoir as a catalyst for community.

The Church’s Response: Stories as Sacrament

The church is no stranger to self-narrative, understood in Christian circles as spiritual testimony, and Augustine’s Confessions is just one example. Beginning with the gospels and later patterned in martyology, hagiography, confession and conversion testimony, the story paradigm is rooted in ancient church tradition. The church has an evangelistic responsibility to engage the rising confessional characteristic of culture for kingdom purposes rather than dismissing it as a narcissistic endeavor. The church need not be suspicious of the collective cultural cry for self-understanding, having its own so satisfied in the Person of Christ. Instead, the church must bridle the technique of self-narrative for Christian testimony, and affirm the art of life story as a powerful witness for grace.

The pattern for spiritual testimony finds its structure in the grand drama of redemption, as the unfolding story of a believer’s sanctification is only understood in the identification with the rhythms of Christ’s life, death and resurrection. The storyteller must then recognize the tension between the cosmic Story of redemption and the echoing story of personal redemption. By telling personal story within the framework of God’s Story, we can engage the cultural trend of self-narrative while adding the new, redemptive element of pointing beyond the self to the Savior.

The cultural rise in the self-narrative affords the church a powerful opportunity to channel the very same confessional trait into spiritual testimony. The church can enter the social scene of life-writing by affirming it in theology as sacrament and encouraging it in practice as testimony. The church is already a credible voice in the self-narrative genre not only because of its tradition of testimony, but also in its sacramental ability to transcend the very story it tells by praising the grace of the Divine Author, something no secular memoir can claim. The art of testimony, then, trades a religion of solipsism, characterized by self-devotion, for a religion of sacrament, marked by the surpassing of the self to point to the Savior.

Stephanie S. Smith graduated from Moody Bible Institute with a degree in Communications and Women’s Ministry, which she now puts to work freelancing as a book publicist and writer through her business, (In)dialogue Communications, at www.stephaniessmith.com. After living in Chicago for four years, traveling to Amsterdam for a spell, and then moving back home to Baltimore to plan a wedding, she now lives with her husband in Upstate New York where they make novice attempts at home renovation in their 1930s bungalow. She is a member of the Young Professionals of the Southern Tier and blogs for Moody Publishers at www.insidepages.net.

Thankfulness

Bonnie Ponce reflects on being thankful. Thankfulness.  It is a word that we think of around Thanksgiving but recently I have been thinking a lot about being thankful.  The other day my husband and I were watching Veggie Tales, which may be strange since we don't have kids, but we were watching the episode with Madam Blueberry.  She is a very "blue" berry who is sad.  She is told that buying more stuff will make her happy but on her way to Stuff Mart she sees a less fortunate girl thanking her parents for a meager birthday dessert of apple pie.  Later she sees a little boy ask for a cool train set but is told no by his father and instead he gets a bouncy ball and he also says thank you, making an impression on Madam Blueberry, who learns to be thankful.

Seeing this short video made me think about my wish list - all the stuff I want and if I had money to burn I would probably begin to make a dent in my list.  It also made me think about what I am thankful for in my life.  Thankfulness is tough - it is so much easier to go through life, see stuff, and want it but to be thankful you have to use your brain and think of what you are thankful for.

Thankfulness is the language of love and joy.  It speaks from a heart overflowing with hope of good things to come.  With Relief I see many good things coming in the future and I hope that with the Love Relief campaign we can continue to bring great literature!

Just an ending thought on thankfulness:

Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a gift and not giving it. -unknown

Bonnie Ponce is the Director of Support Raising for Relief and lives in Huntsville, Texas with her husband and betta fish. She has a BA in English from Sam Houston State University. After work she enjoys relaxing with a good book or working on her novel.

Do Anger and Creating Mix?

Are You Reading Along?

Have you clicked over to Don Miller's Blog lately? You know I have, because this isn't the first link I've posted on the Relief site. He's been blogging a series on "The Way of A Creator," and I think Relief readers everywhere should be reading along.

Anger + Creation = ?

Today, his post states that "A Creator Resists the Urge to Create out of Anger." You'll want to read the whole post, but here's a quick quote:

The public only has a consciousness so big, and when you create something good, and it gets into the public consciousness, there’s less room for whatever it is that made you angry. So go and create something good, and displace whatever it is that is pissing you off.

This post has me thinking about Relief's beginnings. Part of our story is that the vision for this journal was born out of frustration. I'll be honest--sometimes "Christian" literature makes me angry. For years we've endeavored to create something that displaces the sometimes-overly-sanitized work that well, pisses us off... okay, I'm not sure I'm following Don's advice in this sentence.

Thoughts? How do you, as a creator, wrestle your anger? Do you agree with Don's advice?

So Close, So Far Apart

I'm not a Catholic (and I've never even played one on TV), but I have so many friends who are that I'm always interested in what's going on in the Catholic Church. Today, Reuters has an interesting article on a recent--and I think very wise--warning from Pope Benedict concerning the subtle dangers of online social networks. In a message for the Catholic Church's World Day of Communications, Benedict says: "It is important always to remember that virtual contact cannot and must not take the place of direct human contact with people at every level of our lives."

I've long been bothered by a line from Andrew Lloyd Weber and Tim Rice's Jesus Christ Superstar: "Why'd you [Christ] choose such a backward time in such a strange land? If you'd come today you could have reached a whole nation. Israel in 4 B.C. had no mass communication."

On the surface, this seems like a really good question. But now, in the midst of this present "communication age," in which people the whole world over are growing more and more connected, while as persons, as individual men and women, so many are more isolated and lonely than ever, I think I'm beginning to understand that it simply wouldn't have worked. All of the mass communication in the universe could not relay what Christ had in mind with the Church--individual persons communing with one another as a whole. Feeding, soothing, and yes, touching one another. Greeting each other, as the New Testament says, "with a holy kiss," not a virtual finger poke.

The next issue of Relief will open up for presales this week, and the stories, essays, and poems inside follow a similar theme of isolation vs. communion. I hope you will order a copy as soon as it is available. Not only will you help us make our print run, you'll also get to read some of the finest writing we've published so far.

Beauty, Any Beauty

Poetry Editor Brad Fruhauff read two things about beauty today and couldn't help but put them together.

Mark Jarman in "Tea Fire"* tells of driving toward a forest fire one evening, "seduced / like night moths," to witness its terrible beauty. He and his unnamed, unnumbered companion(s) are in awe of the way the smoke turns silver as it passes over the moon and the way the "red body" of the fire seems to desire to follow the waves of "ashy cumulus" into the sky. Then, however, they come upon homes threatened by the fire and turn back "embarrased--"

Not moths at all but dazzled lovers of beauty, any beauty.

The poem works because Jarman convinces us as readers of the beauty of the fire just as the "we" of the poem saw it, but then we share, too, in the abashment of realizing that this beauty comes at the cost of people's homes. It is immaterial whether the homes are the extravagant vacation cottages of the wealthy which, when we hear of them, we often want to think were extraneous and expendable anyways; for Jarman, they are still homes - "doomed homes," in fact. The valence of the poem is that the dazzling beauty of the fire momentarily dislocated the speaker from the heaviness of this world of responsibility and care.

"Not moths at all" could be read as "not drawn to the fire by a morbid fascination with death - our own or others," for it is the threat of destruction by fire that embarrasses the travelers. But "dazzled lovers" does seem to suggest that their difference from moths is not in their volition but in the object. They are drawn by beauty rather than destruction, but they are drawn just the same. As "lovers," they exist in a timeless, even exclusive state - the state of early passion familiar from our adolescence that, we must admit, while pleasant is not without blame. Yet the poem affirms that what they pursued was, indeed beauty - any beauty, beauty wherever it can be found when it is so rare a thing.

I've been thinking about beauty ever since I started studying the sublime. Beauty is often figured as the pacific, angelic counterpart to the dark, excessive sublime - roughly the attributes of Blake's Heaven and Hell, respectively. Suffice to say that Hell and the sublime are quite chic these days, while beauty is trite at best (think Snow White) and dangerous at worst (something like her wicked step-mother). Classical beauty, after all, entailed an ability of the viewer to perceive it adequately, which we nowadays recognize as the road to violence.

Enter David Bentley Hart's The Beauty of the Infinite: The Aesthetics of Christian Truth (Eerdmans, 2003). There are a number of bold and counterintuitive aspects to this title, but suffice to say Hart does not find beauty violent or trite. Instead, he attributes to beauty a "gratuity" and a "prodigality" that gives of itself - sometimes in startling and disturbing ways: "a village ravaged by pestilence may lie in the shadow of a magnificent mountain ridge . . . ; Cambodian killing fields were often lushly flowered." Beauty is saved from the violence of abstraction precisely by its particularity, its inherence in just such a arrangement of things. Christian beauty, he argues, inheres in the unavoidable and often offensive narratives of the gospels; most centrally, of course, in the life, death, and resurrection of Christ.

In "Tea Fire" Jarman registers our modern ambivalence about beauty - something we're drawn to but also embarrassed about. It's a tension also present in "The Heronry." Seeking the solace of a forest preserve, he reflects on his own processes as he sits quietly observing a pond and its many birds. Among his many reflections are these final ones, which I hope I'm okay in quoting at length:

I almost think I could write about it forever, Adding word to word like coral in a reef, An excess of language like the genetic code, an extravagance like all the stars, Too much ever to be needed except By the need for there always to be more, That need which, when the end comes, looks past it For woods and hills and ocean, For fields and streets and houses and horizon, Repelled by blankness, expecting beyond sleep The dream country and its population.

Here he finds himself caught between beauty, language, and desire. Is his experience a projection of his own need "for there always to be something more"? (And if so, what?) Or does it inhere, as Hart would argue, somehow in the world itself, if not in any precise way? Or is it a function of language, words that spring up in the mind as a coral reef?

Jarman's poems may lack the confidence that faith ostensibly offers, but they are nonetheless compelling meditations on beauty because they are full of the desire that faith, in many ways, is - desire for there to be more than what is given and at the same time desire for the given to be "given," as a gift, as what is not labored for or dubiously "earned." Sometimes the challenge for the (American) Christian is to clear away the screen of faith to see - really see - the manifestations of glory that so many have pointed us toward without knowing their name.

* Jarman's poems can be found in the Autumn 2010 edition of The Hudson Review.